Tag: how can i become more positive

How to Overcome a Negative Mindset

Our minds have the tendency of thinking negatively. This is because our brains are built on survival mode. In order for us to live, our minds make conclusions based upon our experiences. Some of these conclusions are positive, such as eating food as a means of surviving. Others are negative, such as the avoidance of touching fire to prevent burns.

Our negative mindsets can be based upon conclusions that we’ve generated over several experiences. It might even just take one negative experience to create a negative perspective. But with practice, you can catch which negative ideas are actually causing you more harm than good.

Let’s say you’ve had an encounter with the opposite gender in school. You had a crush, and you decided to confess your feelings to this one person. Instead of receiving what you perceive to be a good response (acceptance), you are quickly rejected and humiliated. This experience make “scar you” for life and prevent you from seeking our romantic interests.

However, what if you could change that thought into a positive experience? What if you could perceive rejection as good, as it allows you to disassociate yourself from people who are not interested and give you a chance to move on to someone else? Of course, being rejected by your crush may not be a good feeling, but it allows you to move on and try with someone else. It removes all the ambiguity of does he/she like me or not.

The people who are greatest at overcoming negative mindsets are the ones who allow the negativity to come into their life and go just as easily. They are people who try to look at the brighter side of things. Or, they develop positive coping skills that allow them to move on from negativity. Some people go a step further by examining those negative events and learning from those experiences.

What do you do when you experience negativity? Do you wallow in it, or do you learn from it, look for the positive, and move on from it?

Suffering in Silence

Many people suffer in silence. Instead of opening up, they hold back for one of many reasons. Some of these reasons include fear of judgment, fear of rejection, a state of ambivalence, not wanting to express or share sadness, and holding back anger as to not treat other people badly.

Is it okay to suffer in silence?

Some people are better at managing their emotions and feelings more than others. Sometimes, others may feel like they need to change their environment in order to feel more like themselves. These people generally are able to adapt and change their habits or misplaced judgments quickly.

So, there is nothing necessarily wrong with suffering alone. But, it can be a relief to some to get some outside help, whether that’s through a therapist, close friends and family, or a self-help book.

How can I get myself back to being in a more conscious and positive state of being?

Conscious awareness takes practice. It requires you to be mindful of your thoughts and actions. It could also mean that you have to take a step back to see where your mindset is.

What are your fears? What are your dreams? Are you fears holding you back from living your dream? Are there any steps that you can take right now to combat with or overcome those fears?

Journalling is a good way to process your emotions and feelings. It is a private way to express yourself, while also giving you an outlet to pour out all your emotions. It also allows you to practice mindfulness and be aware of your state of being. Wherever you are now can always changing, depending on your willingness and dedication to improving yourself.

Just realize that in the end, the suffering is in your mind. It does not have to always exist. It can be replaced with more positive and affirming thoughts or emotions. One way to do this is to remove limiting beliefs.

Why Negativity is Sometimes Okay

In the personal development field, people are alluded to believing that you must be positive 100% of the time. However, this is not realistic. And sometimes, negativity is needed in order to figure out what the truth is.

When you are too optimistic, you could become manic and trust people too easily. Or, you may overexert yourself. With negativity, you learn how to be more wary of people and circumstances.

It is best to find that balance between negativity and positivity. There are ways to not sink deep into negativity though, and that is by perpetual inner growth. In the path of growth, the negativity manifests as obstacles. You can use positivity as a way to guide you through these obstacles, and negativity to dissuade yourself from pursuing paths that are not aligned with the truth.

Positivity and negativity are determined my our thoughts, our feelings, and our emotions. They are based around our experiences. When you experience positivity, you are in alignment with truth and love. With negativity, you are off course, and you must find your way back to being balanced.

Recently, I set a goal of exercising five times a week. Even though I could go to the gym every weekday, I realized that this was too high of a goal. My body is not used to working out that much. So, I’m using negativity as a guide. Rather than being overly optimistic and marathoning on the treadmill or elliptical with no breaks, I have decided to start going to Zumba classes for more lighthearted exercise. The gym that I go to has Zumba classes four days a week, so I’ll restart with that.

When you start off a business, you might be overly optimistic about the results you get (i.e. how much money you made, the quality of service/good, etc.). You have to perceive your experience through the lens of negativity too. It helps keep your grounded and balanced.

Negativity also comes in handy for relationships. When you find yourself hanging around people who do not have the same values as you do, it may be time to cut off friendships or to slowly wean them off. This can help you make time for people you would prefer to hang around.

I found myself gradually separating myself from friends and family as a way to discover my true self. Sometimes, friends and family can be contributing to the negativity that you are spiraling downward from. So, you may want to do spend time alone if you feel yourself sinking down into negativity. Explore yourself and figure out what it is that is bothering you. Learn how to embrace the negativity and to allow it to guide you. So long as you don’t allow negativity to consume, you are good.

As I have suggested before, you might want to start by journalling your thoughts. Alternatively, you can seek therapy or coaching from others to find out what is wrong.